


the time the righteous man cried

by demonhunterknight



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Angst, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Comfort, Crying, Dean Needs A Hug, Dean Winchester Bears the Mark of Cain, Dean Winchester Cries, Dean Winchester Needs a Hug, Emotional Hurt, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, F/M, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Hurt/Comfort, Hugs, Hurt Dean Winchester, Hurt/Comfort, Mark of Cain (Supernatural), Reader-Insert, Reader-Interactive, Sad
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-11-08
Updated: 2019-11-08
Packaged: 2021-01-25 12:32:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings, No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21356314
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/demonhunterknight/pseuds/demonhunterknight
Summary: He can't take it anymore, he can't handle it, he doesn't know how, he doesn't want to, and he can't stop all the thoughts that come to his head.
Relationships: Dean Winchester/Reader, Dean Winchester/You, Dean/You, Dean/reader
Kudos: 33





	the time the righteous man cried

_You were just a scared little boy whose afraid to be on his own because daddy never loved him._

_Everybody leaves you Dean, have you noticed? Mommy, daddy, even Sam._

_You’re a coward, sad, clingy, needy._

The mirror smashes, shards falling down onto the sink, clattering against the basin, tiny fragments litter the man’s clenched fist, droplets of blood being drawn to the skin from the fresh cuts that littler his knuckles as a result of the mirror. He draws a shaky breath, his eyes flickering shut, before remaining closed for a minute, and then they open again, green eyes looking up at his reflection. Watching himself for a moment before the words come back again.

_I know how you look into a mirror and hate what you see._

He draws back, shaking his head, and turning away from himself, he doesn’t want to see it anymore, he doesn’t recognise the face that stares back at him.

_You wanna die._

He closes his eyes again.

_You are nothing._

Opens them.

_Your problem is, that no one hates you, more than you._

And the tears finally begin to fall.

_And no one can save you because you don’t wanna be saved._

He blinks them away, furiously wiping at his eyes, removing any proof that he actually let it out.

Then the door opens.

Slowly at first, creaking open a fraction, letting in a beam of light from the other room, a hand grabs the edge of the door, and a figure appears in the doorway.

“Dean?” A voice shakily calls, stepping into the room, eyes glancing around, landing on the mirror first, and then towards the man. He looks away, not wanting to look her in the eye, he keeps his vision on the tiled floor.

“Dean, look at me…” The voice says, stepping forward, reaching a hand forward, but he waves it away, shaking his head in the process.

“No” He says, mumbling slightly, barely audible, but she hears, and ignores him. She stands, watching him for a moment before walking towards him, enveloping her arms around his torso, and burying her head in his chest.

“It’s inside me” He starts, his words shaking, his arms shakily reaching around her smaller body, pulling her tightly, she mumbles into his chest.

“I know, I know” She whispers, running her hands down his back, in soft circling motions. Humming softly.

“I.. I need some help” He starts, his voice breaking, her heart shattering, and she looks up at him, tears forming in the corners of her eyes.

“Please” He begs, and she nods.

“I know, and I’m here” She says, pulling at his sleeve, and trying to get him out of the room. He stumbles forward, letting her do so, and she pulls him onto his bed, it sinks under the weight of both of them, and she pulls up her knees so her whole body is on the bed, he does the same, and she pulls him down so his head hits the pillow, and she draws his body to hers once more, wrapping her arms securely around his chest, and he wraps his around hers carefully, like she’d break under his touch.

“Talk to me” She pleads, and he opens his mouth, and lets out a shaky breath before starting.

“This, this thing, whatever it is, it’s changing me, I tell myself that everything I do, I do for the right reason, and I always believed that what we do is important, no matter what the cost, no matter who we lost, and now Cas, and Sam, and even you…. I hurt you, I can’t live with this… this thing, anymore” He says, his voice wavering, and you wrapped your arms tighter around him, and he continues to speak. “This thing, this things gotta go” He says, and stops speaking.

“Dean…” She starts, thinking about what to say “This mark, it doesn’t make you who you are, it doesn’t define you, and I can’t tell you I know what you’re going through, but me, Sam, Cas, we’re all here, no one is going to leave you” She speaks.

“The mark, it’s a curse, the first curse, but still it can be removed” You say, and Dean rests his head on yours.

“It doesn’t feel like it can” He mumbles, stroking her hair. And she hummed.

“I know, I know” She says, shifting closer.

“Dean…” She says, hesitant.

“Yeah?” He hums, and she takes a breath in before speaking,

“I love you” She states, simply, and his body stiffens, he draws back slightly, and she moves her arm away from him, looking up at him, feeling vulnerable.

“You… You do?” He asks, and she nods. He lets out a breath and smiles slightly, it wasn’t the kind of smile he gave Sam, the nod and half smile to try and claim he was fine, an actual smile. One she hadn’t seen in a while.

“I love you too” He says, bringing her to his chest and pressing a kiss to her forehead, she smiles and rests her head on his chest.

“Y/n” Dean says, and she looks up at him.

“Yeah?” She asks, and he moves closer.

“I want to sleep” He says, and she looks at him, and sees the nervousness in his eyes, he hasn’t slept in ages, the mark keeping him awake at night with nightmares, the bunker being filled with his screams and shouts every single night.

“Then sleep” She says, and he moves some hair out of her face.

“Stay” He mumbles, pressing a kiss to the tip of her nose. And she blushes.

“I’m not going anywhere” She says, and he nods, before pressing his lips against hers finally, and she closes her eyes, kissing him back, and when he pulls away he’s smiling at her, and she smiles back.

“I love you” he mutters again, and closes her eyes, his breathing settling and she leans into his chest, letting her eyes close too.

“I love you too” She says, but he doesn’t reply, his eyes are shut and his breathing is shallow and even, she smiles.

“Goodnight Dean” She says, and closes her eyes, letting herself fall asleep.

Sunlight creeps in through the window, and her eyes flicker open, smiling at the warm body next to her, she moves closer to it, and Dean hums, wrapping an arm around her, pressing a soft kiss to her forehead.

“Morning sweetheart” He mutters into her ear, and she shifts her body so she’s looking at him.

“How’d you sleep” She mumbles, and he hugs her.

“The best I’ve had in months” He says, “Honestly”

“Good” She mumbles, and closes her eyes, resting her head on his chest, he chuckles softly, and whispers into her ear.

“I love you”


End file.
